An outsider, that’s what I am. A rebel since birth, an introspective. I question my beliefs, I affirm my morals. I love with passion, I fight injustice with a bleeding heart. I am not part of the elite, I am not part of the “in crowd.” I have cupped the face of a few hardened souls, I have held the hands of one homeless too many. Yet as I have tried my damnest to save lives, I feel helpless in the face of dangerous and dirty politics facing my two worlds. I love my people, but I’m afraid the people that I love has now turned to hate. Hate for their fellow sufferers. Hate for each others’ differences. Hate that has overpowered too many hearts and minds: where change and progress might have occurred, we are now clouded and painfully covered in hate.
I am no saint. I have fallen prey to hate and rage far too many times lately. It is hard for my feminist heart not be affected by misogyny, especially when such is expressed by the highest ruler of the lands. It is hard to sleep well at night when I know my fellow immigrants are being beaten, bullied, and deported due to a flawed immigration system. It breaks me to know that impoverished countrymen in my otherworld fall victim to the war on drugs, and that young potential minds have been wasted and killed in the crossfire. I feel defeated and helpless.
Yet…there can be hope. For I do not have a one sided view of these tragedies–
I do not blame anyone for wanting to make “America great again” I understand seeking to improve the US economy, for tax and healthcare reforms. However, I do not believe they can be achieved by bigoted immigration laws and a tolerance for white supremacy. I do not believe in inequity and creating laws to make the richer rich and the poor worse off. There has to be a better way. The current POTUS was not elected by mere hate alone. He has touched upon the disillusion of many, and it is that disillusionment that needs to be addressed. Unfortunately, instead of turning the disheartened into positive changers, it has only increased the hate in their hearts. Hate that has turned to blame and loathing for others that do not look like them, hate that has blinded them to the plight of people similar to their own ancestors’ survival, hate that has made it near impossible to institute any real and logical change in the land of unlimited possibilities. Yet I cannot react in hate. Hate begets hate, and it is a vicious never ending cycle that has put us in the predicament we are in now. Instead of responding in rage, I want to feel their rage and seek to help. Instead of hating them for hating me, I choose to love, and open myself to these people, so they can see me as more than an outsider, but part of this vast colorful country that we all choose to love and defend.
In my homeland, the war on drugs have taken its toll. Countless lives have been taken, and more will be. The latest victims are young teens, boys whose lives have been cut short by this bloody war. Do I believe it is the President’s fault? Do I believe the drug cartels are the ones killing each other off? Do I also think that the opposition may have a hand in this war? I DO NOT KNOW. Moreover, I also think those are the wrong questions to ask. The more important, meaningful question is how can we help the country alleviate itself of the drug problem? If we abhor the violence, what are we doing to help, really truly help the victims? Violence makes me flinch. But I flinch even more at people spewing hate in the name of human rights. You do not care about human rights if you only care about the dead dealers/addicts and not the people killed by these dealers. You also cannot call yourself a true human rights advocate if you ignore the police arrogance/violence. You want justice and human rights? Then HELP. Donate to the rehab centers. Volunteer and give to the shelters. Do the hotline for abused women. Drug addiction is a true epidemic, believe me, I’ve seen it. It is a disease, that needs to be treated and prevented, not killed. Love him or hate him, Pres. Duterte has established many rehab centers and helped women in domestic cases. What have you done?
I am not here to convince you of my beliefs. I am not here to condemn anyone of their beliefs. But I am here to challenge you of your beliefs. Whether you are left or right, Yellow or DDS- that you stop seeking to be right, and seek to find unity and progress in our differences. That your beliefs pushes you to help- to build, not destroy; to lift and not to stomp on others. I am using my pen (or phone) to exercise my power to lift you. I am using my meager savings to help those who need it more. Use yourself for others. That is the most powerful political statement one can ever make today.
Flawed Fem 